Grass Buffet

When I graze Mathilda, my wants are simple. Is she about to roll? Am I downhill from her in the event of catastrophic system failure? If the answer is no to both, I go back to my book and let her get on with it. Hubby pays more attention [Grazing]. The most recent time out he noticed that there were certain grasses she preferred. So, he began to look for patches of those. When he tried to show her what he had found, the exchange went like this:
Hubby tugs on leadrope.
Mare resists.
Hubby drags her head out of the grass and over to new place.
Mare: What? Leave me alone.
Hubby: Here. Look at what I found.
Mare: Go away. What could you possibly know about grazing? Oh look, the good stuff.
Mare: Why are you hassling me? Oh look, the good stuff.
She never did admit that he was of any assistance.

Horse Hunt Progress Report #1

I have contact two individuals and one trainer for more details & videos. Not holding out huge hopes for the individual horses. One has a Cadillac description and a junk-yard price. Either the horse’s attributes are generously interpreted or it’s the steal of the century. The other sounds nice enough but is a breed I’m not crazy about. Okay, I’ll say it. I just don’t see the attraction of European Warmbloods. Anglo-App, Anglo-Arab, Appendix QH, sure. While I have nothing against European horses in theory, I’ve never sat on one that I felt was worth the hype. Could be I’ve never met the right Warmblood. Neither ad gives the horse’s age.

I have high hopes for a response from the trainer. She found a lovely horse for a friend (i.e. a Find-me-one-of-those kinda horse) and her ad actually describes the horses as individuals. Some are for riders headed to the upper levels, some are not. Some need a supportive ride, some are still green in dressage. What a relief. It is beyond useless when a barn web site describes every horse as elastic, athletic, with lovely gaits. What are they, robo-horses?

My brilliant maneuver, I hope, is that I have hired a Fairy Godmother*. No one in my area wants to take on the project, so I’ve found someone I trust to help me sort through the online ads & videos. And whack me over the head with her magic wand should I become overly whiny and obstreperous. It’s nothing a friend wouldn’t offer to do, but you can impose on friends only so many times. When looking for Rodney, I asked for opinions on 2 or 3 candidates. (Tellingly, none of them were Rodney. I was buying him & didn’t want to hear opinions to the contrary).

I foresee needing more help than friendship alone would bear. It took me a year to find Rodney and I knew what I was looking for. This time, I don’t have a clue. How can I explain that to a seller over the phone? In the interest of both crowdsourcing and generating content, I’ll ask you the same question I asked FG. Should I check out a local horse if I am unlikely to buy?

Waste of my time.
Waste of the owner’s time.
Putzing about will only aggravate this mysterious local perception that I am not serious about finding a horse.

I could be wrong. The horse could be perfect.
The perfect horse could be one stall over.
It’s good practice. I learn something with ever visit, even if it is only, ‘Oh, please no’.
It will get the word out.
What else I got to do with my time?

Sounds as if I should. Sigh. What think you, go/no go?
List of Horse Hunting posts.

*In Cinder-blogging-ella I agreed that the Fairy Godmother myth was falsely enabling. So, the proper term here would be advisory committee, or mentor, or rabbi. Fairy Godmother has a better ring. Plus, the dress is so much sparklier.

Kitten report.
They have been cleared for the run of the house at night. Twice now, Lady (80-lb German Shepherd) has been chased off her dog mattress unto our bed by their 4 am frolics.

Crush! Kill! Destroy!

I am a peaceful soul. I usher wasps back outside. I let spiders and snakes live. When we first moved onto this property, I went to check the barn. A slight motion out of the corner of one eye resolved into a humongous rat on a rafter above the aisle. Panning back revealed an equally impressive snake looped back & forth over the other end of the rafter. I shut off the light, backed out of the barn, & left them to resolve their differences. Never saw either one of them again.

The exceptions to this detente are all bug-related, particularly horse flies, deer flies, enormous armored black bugs, and their ilk. Threaten to bite one of my horses? Strike fast, strike hard, and finish by stomping the carcass into the ground in case it was only stunned. Sanctity of life? Hah! Eat boot, and die!

What is your Live and Let Live limit?
Rodney’s Alphabet
For the Gentle Reader who asked after LEGO kittens yesterday.

Patient Management Update

Mathilda had a slight relapse on Thursday. Hubby was doing evening chores. She was fine – or at least status quo. He came down to the house. Five minutes later, he was back at the barn and she was unwilling to put weight on her bad leg. No idea what happened. We agree she took a funny step. He thinks she was fussing due to the storm. I chose to look at it as a good sign. When I’m really sick, I’m easy to deal with. Just put me to bed or shoot me. I don’t care which. When I start to recover, I get cranky & restless. I think she’s getting tired of standing in her gilded cage.

Doubled her dosage last night & she is much better. Today (Friday) I’ve been taking her out on several short grazes in place of two long ones and two quick carrot checks. Same number of trips to the barn, just reallocating the time. So, no substantive change in activity. The psychic toll, however, we do not need.

And now for something completely different. At our house, we spend July celebrating athleticism by sitting on our butts watching the Tour de France bike race. The intermediate sprints are marked with a green banner bearing the PMU logo and a horse head, video. It stands for Pari Mutuel Urbain, a French betting concern. A recent PMU entry into the insanity that is the publicity caravan.

All I can think of is
PREgnant MAre urINne

Do you Tour?

A Flash of Donkey

A donkey-themed restaurant.


Attention Real Photographers
Clearly, I have no idea how to handle artificial light or my flash. Two questions:
How would you photograph these objects, including a shiny silver wall-hanging and a heavily varnished wall mural if
a) You had all the time, access & equipment in the world?
b) You found yourself at lunch with a PhD camera (Canon PowerShot SD750) in your pocket and the access granted a normal customer?

And The Winner Might Be …

I have 3 questions:

1) This was a nomination. When are the winners announced? “It’s an honor to be nominated” & “I’m just happy to make the Team” are believable until the awards ceremony/competition. Then, I want to be up on the dais/in front of the victory gallop. Not making nice-nice noises with the also-rans.

2) Each nominee is supposed to nominate 15 addition blogs. The backtrail from here goes: Rodney’s Saga nominated by Writing From the Right Side of the Stall nominated by la Vida loca nominated by Crazy-Train to Tinky Town, at which point the path bifurcates as Crazy Train was nominated by several folks. That makes 5 generations, at least, which tops 50,000 blogs. (1st gen =1, 2nd gen = 15. 3rd gen = 225. 4th gen = 3,375. 5th gen = 50,625. Unless the originator is the 0th generation, which means 5th gen = 759,375.) So the question is, at what point do the number of nominations exceed the number of people on the planet?

3) What is it? I can’t Google a website nor an explanation of the award. Not even a Wikipedia entry, which I didn’t think was possible.

With the honor comes responsibilities:

1) I must thank & link back to the nominating blog, Writing From the Right Side of the Stall, which I do most heartily, despite the ungracious things I say herein. She’ll understand. She might even be proud. One of the things I admire about WFtRSotS is that she lets out the snark which I am too much of a pansy to express in print.

2) I must give 7 Surprising Things About Myself. Nope. I am not a person of hidden depths. High-maintenance, moody, difficult – sure. Subtle, complicated, abounding in subtext – no. Meet me for an hour, or read my back posts, and you will know all there is to know: I read science fiction [Barn Books], I play with LEGO [BrickFair: day 2], I like animals [entire archive], etc… No one has ever said to me, “You’ve been quiet over there. Tell us what you’re thinking.” This outlook has advantages. Passive aggressive tactics get no traction. If a person says, “Let’s do X.” while meaning, “If you loved me, you would do Y.” I simply wag my tail like a big, happy dog and go forth to do X.

3) I must in turn nominate other blogs. The horse blogs I have found are listed on my blogroll, 32 & growing. Nominating half of them seems as selective as the 68-team playoff in NCAA basketball. A little exclusivity folks?

OTOH, I will use this as an excuse to plug non-horse blogs and to continue the triad theme I’ve got going:

Blithe Traveler. Also nominated by WFtRSotS, for recounting a life “which makes me very, very jealous (except when it comes to icky forest leeches).” The term you are looking for is support system, not mutual admiration society. I enjoyed her (BT not WFetc.) two $700 Pony books. When I went to China, I emailed her for advice. We stayed in touch. Did NaNoWriMo together, sharing daily word counts, encouragement, and crises. I read her blog. I’ve watch her children grow up in photographs. I retell her stories to Hubby. I tell her way TMI, I’m sure. I count her as a close friend. Yet, the one thing I keep forgetting about her is that we have never met. Is this virtual living a boon or creepy? Am I fashion forward or do I need to find three-dimensional friends?

into mind. A schizophrenic combination of Beautiful People make-up/jewelery/fashion and psychological insight of such depth that you can’t believe it comes from a 20-something [What].

My Body The City: The Secret Life of a Callgirl. This is the Internet. It could be true. It could be electronic codswallop. Either way, it’s a powerful account. If you’ve ever wondered why women don’t just leave such a life, she’ll convince you.

None of these mentions constitute a formal nomination. BT was just nominated, into mind and My Body are too popular to need my help, So the insanity stops here. Although, I reserve the right to change my mind.

What is your favorite non-horse blog?

I Do. But Why?

Horse Nation had a post on Top 10 Perks of Dating/Marrying a Horse Girl. I object to “girl” as would anyone with this much frost on her roof. However, it did make me wonder what Hubby gets out of living with my horse fixation. BTW – he knows he’s in it for the long haul. At one point, I idly floated the possibility of having no horses and doing other things with our time. He didn’t even stop to think. “No. I’m not living with you without a horse.” He’s a keeper, I tell you. So, aside from the wondrousness that is my serene and equitable disposition, what does he get out of the deal?

I understand competition. Get up at 2 am so we arrive in time to warm up before your boat race? Do all the driving so you can rest? Hand me the keys.

I understand toys. Carbon-fiber bicycle? Of course. If you are going to participate, you need the proper equipment.

Unless I’m dressing for a show, my looks are low-cost. I wouldn’t know where to get manis, pedis, salon cuts, or this year’s fashions. I once cut my hair with a set of clippers (Horse Nation #8). Seriously. I had long hair. I wanted short. No haircuttery would believe that I wanted it so super short. Wasn’t the worst my hair has ever looked.

I have a flexible attitude toward dirt. A person who has eaten leftover pizza during morning chores has lost her finicky cred.

I am in no position to object to dog hair. I still get a little stunned by large amounts of dog poop. Horse poop dries up to become essentially hay. Carnivore poop is .. nothing one wants to think about.

More on toys. We have a farm. Therefore, we have a tractor. Theoretically, we both can drive it. When it comes down to cases, he seems to be the one in the driver’s seat. Furthermore, when Hubby had an accident with our old tractor, I demanded he shop for the most expensive, latest model tractor that he could bring himself to buy.

Such a deal.

How does your horse hobby (or whatever) help your relationship?

Prior horse & husband post: Husband Training.