Leading Her On

More thoughtful commentary from reader Louise Swan. Previous post by Louise: I Beg to Differ, A Guest Post. Welcome Louise:

My father was the Gunnery Officer on a Liberty Ship in the Pacific during  World War 2.  It was a long way between ports of call. Not one to sit idle, he kept busy by making conch shell jewelry for my mother and canvas duffel bags for himself.

And he played cribbage.  Our whole family was good at cards and Dad was especially good. I don’t know whether he learned cribbage on board ship or whether he knew it before he enlisted. I suspect the latter. 

Since the Captain was an avid cribbage player, he and Dad, the two officers, spent many hours playing. One of the first things he did when he returned home was to teach me how to play. I was about four years old.

In a recent post [Part 1], Katherine’s mother noted that all of the riders in the lead line class were so good that they all got blue ribbons. One reader objected to that result.

Let me explain how my father taught me cribbage. At first, after each hand, he showed me the points I had missed and added them to my score.

Once I started beating him, he showed me the points but I did not get credit for them. Once I started beating him with those rules, he raised the bar again.

We played from then on as the game should be played: if your opponent sees points you missed, those points are added to the opponents score, not yours. By that time, I knew how to play the game we had a level playing field. Decades later, I now play cribbage on my iPad.

If I had played by the “grown-up” rules at the start, I would not have continued playing. There was so much to learn all at once that losing every time would have made the effort pointless, especially at four.

The same is true with horse shows. There is so much to learn: working with a horse, getting all dressed up, waiting and waiting and then being in the ring on display. If at the end of it, you lose, what is the point to a three-year old?

It is important to absorb the culture of the show, especially the very real dangers of riding and being around horses. Unlike cribbage, mistakes with horses can be fatal. Learn well and learn wisely but learn. If a young rider is discouraged early on, that will be the end of that riding career.

Other riders know that a lead line First has a different context than the other blues. Other riders want the next generation to love the sport. Other riders are delighted to see the tiny ones’ broad smile at the end of the class.

The result isn’t a handful of questionable blues but a handful of future riders and a healthy horse show world.

Just To Put This Out There

A comment from Monday [Note], “I’m sorry your search continues.” I’m sorry too. I’d love to have a horse at home to ride and train and compete.

However.

I am well aware of how many good things I have in my life: my health, a wonderful spouse, and knowledge of where my next meal is coming from. I would be pleased to have all of these things continue.

Even the horse segment isn’t horrid. I have a sweet horse who is fun to work with. We are still lightyears from riding, but Rodney is starting to enjoy his work. Or perhaps we are getting better at engaging him. He appears to appreciate the things we do for him. Yesterday’s yawn was not unusual [Therapeutic].

Saddle seat isn’t the discipline I would have chosen, but I am learning much. I’m even showing more often than I did when I had my own horse in the backyard.

It’s not the life I would design on a holodeck, but it is far from bad.

R and pool 2 wm

“On seeing the pool in the field, he came over at liberty to check it out.” Rodney’s Week

Note to Horse Sellers: We Are Not Idiots. We Are Polite.

Dear Horse Seller:

Have you been getting weak excuses when people aren’t interested in a horse you have just shown?

Let’s say I’m looking at a young, green horse. He’s a little goofy and little unfinished. Not a problem. If his natural talent makes my jaw drop, I’m not going to care if his three gaits are walk, jig, and buck. If he is six months away from making a cute but unexceptional kid’s horse, I am unimpressed by how well-behaved he is today. My boat is not floated.

Let’s say I’m looking at a schoolmaster. He’s expensive. He’s got two years of active competing left, then he will have to be stepped down with a loss of most or all of the purchase price. If this means I will be able to reach a level that I had never expected to achieve – for example, Third Level dressage to get the final scores for my USDF Bronze – and I’m fortunate enough to have the money, hell yeah. If it means two years of packing around Training Level eventing and I’m riding Prelim, not so much.

It’s all about exit strategy.

The horse is too small. The horse is special but not special enough. His talent is average. Our ideas on his value are so far apart that it would be insulting to make an offer based on what I think he’s worth. Do you have any IDEA how lame your horse is?

I’m not going to say any of this to you. Back in the mists of time, we once told a seller what we really thought of his horse. That’s a mistake we won’t make again. At this point, I’ve decided I don’t want your horse. Now, I’m just trying to find a way to leave with everyone’s ego intact. So yeah, I’m going to pick an inoffensive attribute that you already know. Your young horse is too young. Your project horse is too much of a project. Your investment horse is too much of an investment.

Watch the checkbook. If it comes out, I like the horse; if it doesn’t, I don’t. The words are just noise.

Sincerely,
A Prospective Buyer

Which is a long way of saying we went to look at a horse last weekend. Lucky 13 was not.

At least I got a blog post out of it.

Show Tweets: NeGCHA 2014

Co – tweets by co-pilot, aka Mom.

Retweeted by https://twitter.com/wheels_down. Dunno who is second retweet.

oops.

Photo by Mom
Photo by Mom

GA tray

Chicopee Woods Ag Center
Chicopee Woods Ag Center

2014
2014
2013
2013

Show Report ASAC

Missed a “Good Morning!” tweet here. Otherwise, it sounds as if I was sleep-eating.

Things My Momma Told Me

In the Show Report that never ends, here are two items that came up in conversation.

By Any Means Necessary

There were buns but these buns had mandatory bows. Shiny earrings were mandatory. Make-up was mandatory. For those of you who know me and my daughter, right there you know we’re not in Kansas anymore.
Guest Show Report: A Mom’s POV, Part 2

Photo by Mom
Photo by Mom
Photo by Mom
Photo by Mom

So very far from Kansas. Ask anyone who has begged me sit still for hair &/or make-up. My mother watched with amusement as the latest unfortunate volunteer attempted to wrestle me into a lady-like shape.

She said this proves that I will do almost anything to get on a horse.

Duty Calls
My mother also pointed out that horse show conversations are often aborted mid-flight. You may be deep in discussion about the state of the world or their daughter’s ride, only to have the other person walk away without warning. While both parties are talking they are also keeping an eye out for a rider needing help with an outfit, a horse heading for the ring, a loose dog, or any of the other million details of a horse show. If something needs fixed, you leave and fix it. This is so obvious to me that I never gave it a thought.

She likened it to working in a retail establishment. Co-workers chatting. Customer wants to give money. Co-workers stop chatting.

Happy Fourth!