Milton’s Dressage in December

Driving Thursday

I am the World’s Greatest Groom.

Saturday
I sit for 20, even 30, whole minutes in the passenger seat of the truck while we drive the carriage over to the lesson barn.

I stand at the foot of the ramp, nobly steering the carriage, while Greg simply lowers 400 pounds of carriage with his hands and a tow strap.

I drag the carriage the amazing distance of several feet to a parking spot.

I endure more minutes in our comfy truck.

Sunday
I trudge around making sure Rodney has hay in the stall and on the patio and laboriously fill the cookie ball, while Greg faffs about hitching the truck, loading the tack, catching Milton, and so on.

More truck sit.

We arrive.

I remain with Milton, attempting to convince him that being left with me does not constitute abandonment, while Greg amuses himself clearing the ring and moving the carriage.

Tack up. Lunge.

I play immovable object in front of Milton, while Greg runs from side to side attaching and adjusting straps.

Lesson.

I stand, peppermints at the ready, poised to leap into the ring if Milton needs to be headed.

Lesson over.

More immovable object, while all the previously adjusted straps are unbuckled.

I lead Milton all. the. way. back to the trailer. Start undoing the rest of the straps.

Milton is untacked and taken away to be washed. I check my mail.

More watching of Milton, while ring is put to rights.

Bored with Milton-watching, I load up.

We leave.

Milton returns home. I lug brushbox and assorted items from trailer, while Greg unloads tack, rinses trailer, unhitches, and loads winches & co into bed of trailer.

Yet more time in passenger seat, while we reverse the process to pick up the carriage.

I’m a freaking saint.

Rodney continues to be imperturbable when Milton leaves.

My horse is the World’s Greatest Lawn Ornament.

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