Mood On Monday, Same Same

Thoughts

 
Awareness of the outside world. We will never know if we overreacted. We will only know, to our sorrow, if we underreacted.
~~~

Cats of the Birmingham Zoo. Lion. Lion. Pallas kitten. Bobcat. African Wild Cat. Sand Cat. The Wild Cat & the Sand Cat were stalking each other from across the aisle.

Last Mood post was a month ago. I haven’t posted one because not much changes. I could & paste from previous posts. Which is good in some cases. [Mood on Monday, When This Is Over]

Still no personal connection with the virus. Yay. [The Mood On Monday, The Ugly Bits]

Still blogging, riding & biking. Still ineffectively staring into space otherwise. Yay. Boo. [Mood On Monday, Exhaustion and Dead White Men]

Still hanging out at home. Until last week, the most non-essential activity I had done was to buy a donut. : ? “It can also mean an unsureness of what facial expression would be appropriate in this situation.” Urban Dicitonary: : ? Emoticon. [Mood On Monday, Putting The Outside World In Time Out, I should note that mask-wearing compliance was 99% the last time I was at this store. Everyone had a mask on, one employee had their mask half on. Missed 100% by a nose.]

Still benefiting from the shift to virtual. This week The Great American Stamp Show. : ? Just assume this emoticon for the rest of the year.[Mood On Monday, Upside, Hard To Be Happy]

Still horrified by the news. Boo. [Ugly Bits]

Not Happening
I canceled my dental cleaning over the summer. Cases were on the rise in my state. Despite the outstanding procedure on my first visit, standards had slipped when I went for my second visit. I decided routine maintenance could wait. I may have to go back anyway. My other lower, hind molar is aching. I’m starting to suspect that I clench or grind my teeth at night. I wonder why. [Outing Report, In Which I Venture To The Dentist]

Happening
I finally had a small outing. Was in town. Had a few hours before my next appointment. Went to the zoo. Minimal risk as it would be outdoors and uncrowded. The zoo had done a great job adapting to current events. Traffic barriers kept people in a one-way loop. Masks were universal. Frequent sanitizing stations. High-touch points were identified. I did go inside two buildings, but there were few other folks and I stayed away from them.

Attitude
I find my attitude shifts over time.

I spend July in a daze. Burnout. Quarantine fatigue. Call it what you will. I look at a calendar and wonder how we got to August.

This month, I have been getting pissy.

I watch other countries and think, this is why we can’t have nice things. During CoNZealand, they announced the location of a meeting and invited any local people to stop by. My first thought, they shouldn’t be gathering like that. My second thought, in New Zealand they could. We have no excuse for where we are as a country other than a disinclination to get our collective shit together.

Locally, I sit on the sidelines while I watch people conduct themselves as if life was unchanged. I want that. Of course I want the virus not to exist and not to have to remember a mask and to be able to hug my friends and to make travel plans and to generally get on with my life. These are not good choices, certainly not in a part of the country with high case counts and undesirable positivity rates.

I am right? Are they right? Am I overreacting? Are they underreacting? The only way to be sure is for something to go wrong. The only way to convince people that a pandemic is actually happening is for someone to get sick. I don’t want that. So, I sit in my corner and rage inside my head.

Plus, it’s August, Not my favorite month in any year. [Hello September]

And that’s what I have to say about this moment in 2020.

Stay safe. Stay sane.
Katherine Walcott

Categories: Horses

6 replies »

    • Ditto. I am just so tired. Mentally. Physically. Every way. What’s essential? What’s not essential? What’s essential to my mental health which is not great at the best of times, which this obviously isn’t. Coming up on flu season. Gonna be nasty.

  1. Brux. I did not know the condition had a slick name.

    Mayo Clinic, “Bruxism (BRUK-siz-um) is a condition in which you grind, gnash or clench your teeth. If you have bruxism, you may unconsciously clench your teeth when you’re awake (awake bruxism) or clench or grind them during sleep (sleep bruxism).”

    Urban Dictionary, “Slang commonly used to describe something that has been broken, destroyed, or mangled.”

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