Visions of Flying Pigs Wearing Iceskates While Singing, Help Me Make It Happen
Attention Artists. I am looking to commission an artwork, content explained below. Any media. If you are interested, please send your thoughts on what you envision for this project, your rates, and links to examples of your work.
Not an artist? Who would you recommend? Either people you know or artists whose work you admire who might be up for a lark.
This is a paying proposition. [Contact me].
At the end of last year, I had my doubts that my horse would make an appearance in the show ring.
“Rodney: Ha. It could happen. Pigs could fly. The horse could learn to sing. If Rodney sets a hoof in a show ring, any ring, I will commission an artwork of flying pigs wearing iceskates while singing.” [A Radiance of Ribbons]
Seems I was wrong. [Words]
Now I must do what I said I would do. My prediction must be brought to life.
At the end of August, I sent an email query to the artist of my choice. No response. Occurred to me that the first email arrived during a major work event. Sent second, added text that said, “If I do not hear, I will assume you are not interested & won’t ask again.” Sigh. Their style would have been perfect for this.
Nevermind. We will find someone even better. Onwards!
My statement combines three sayings.
One) When pigs fly. Obvious. Wiki says this is an adynaton “a figure of speech so hyperbolic that it describes an impossibility.” Wiki: When Pigs Fly
Two) When Hell freezes over. Also obvious. Wiki has this in their List of idioms of improbability, along with flying pigs.
Three) The horse could learn to sing.
My family has a story. A prisoner comes before the king. Prisoner is condemned to death.
‘Also, your majesty is wise and just,’ says he. ‘I am only sad that my great skill will be lost.’
The kings asks about great skill.
‘I can teach your horse to sing.’
The king is intrigued and grants him a year. If it has not happened in that time, the prisoner will be put to death.
When later asked why he promised such an outlandish thing, the prisoner says, “I have a year. The king could die. I could die. The horse could learn to sing.”
Turns out the story much older. The prisoner is Mullah Nasruddin, The very embodiment of the wise fool. The story is Nasreddin and the Sultan’s Horse, Wiki Books: Sufism/Nasrudin. “The most honored Mullah indicates that all spellings are acceptable when they are on invitations to dinner.” Mullah
Back To The Proposal
Please feel free to scatter this commission as far and as wide as possible to help it find a home with an interested artist.
Thank you for reading,