Note: I wrote this on Tuesday as a companion piece to Wednesday’s post [Universe]. In real time, I’m starting to get a handle on the monkeys. However, I have no doubt they will start screaming again. Therefore, I’m letting this post stand.
After everything that has happened with Rodney, being bucked off Milton first move out of the gate has done nothing to ease the howling vortex that is the inside of my head.
Common wisdom says get right back on the horse.
Screw common wisdom.
The only chance of success is if I go at my own speed. Whatever that is. If that means seven months of lunging and horse petting, so be it. If that means riding next weekend, so be it. If that means I develop an unreasonable fixation against Milton requiring that he be rehomed, so be it.
Mostly I’m trying convince myself.
Everyone has been wonderfully encouraging and supportive. Doesn’t help. No matter who from. No matter how well the person knows me. No matter how much I respect that person’s opinion. No amount of external noise will drown out the internal voice that says You Suck.
I need to make peace with that voice before I can make progress.
Gratuitous Cat Photo
Blue amid books in my office.